May 9, 2009

  • True Confessions

    I have a confession to make. I feel badly about it--well, sort of.  Here it is: It did my heart good the other day to hear that Seth, an employee where I used to work, mixed a bad batch of dough and got written up for it. And here’s another confession while I’m at it: The only thing that would have made it any better is if I had been there to see it happen. It just did me a lot of good!

    Do you have people in your life that seem to do their work perfectly or live in such a way that your less than stellar routines constantly stand out in stark contrast to theirs? And the ‘kicker’ is, he or she makes sure you are aware of your mistakes?! Well, for years, that’s what Seth has been to me. I confess; even though it felt so good at the time, I’m not proud of my response to his misfortune.

    The question I want to deal with is, what do we do with our humanness? What do we do when we fail and don’t do good? It is a common condition--one that we all share regardless of who we are or how hard we try not to fail. It is inevitable that we will be (in fact, are) less than perfect. But what do we do with this uncomfortable reality? What will we do with it?

    It’s interesting how different people approach this common dilemma. Rosemary, a resident of an apartment community that I managed years ago practiced a common solution with a most defiant attitude: "Well, I’m only human!" And with that, she proceeded in her most human manner to continue to make her life and those about her a ‘living-hell’.
         WiteoutImgeQute5-9 What happens when I express my humanity in the not so significant daily events of my life? By opening myself up to life as it really is, I am able to release myself from grossly unrealistic expectations-- I am not God and never will be. To some extent, I am able to relax. I no longer have to work harder and harder every single day to prove that I am just as good or better than everyone else to everyone else–or myself. Because I’m not. I no longer have to measure up to you, or me, or God--because I won’t. I can’t and I never will.

    Do you realize how much pressure that takes off my shoulders? Do you realize the amount of time, energy, concentration and effort that no longer needs to be spent or exerted--in fact, squandered to prove something that is impossible to prove? Add to all of this, the issue of ‘damage control’. Covering up my humanity means I not only must maintain my competence today (like I did yesterday and the day before, and the day before that, etc.), but I must also continually think of creative ways to hide the mistakes that I have already made. Is it any wonder we become so worn out and our nerves become so frayed? Maintaining the illusion of human perfection is a tough ‘row to hoe’!! tired our lives and by the end of the week? ourselves out?! the pressure to prove again today that I am worthy, but what must I continue to do today to cover for the mistakes I made yesterday and the day before that and the day before that, etc?

                           CovrupPsQute5-9

    Coming to the emotional and spiritual place where we are routinely able to accept and confess both our humanity and sinfulness brings us to a tremendous sense of release (this is what forgiveness means) and peace. At peace with ourselves and God. And ironically, at the same moment, we become both more like our Heavenly Father and more human (Luke 6:36). And that’s a good thing!!

                                                                                                                                       LAWEnvro